Five on
Friday!!!
ONE
My most exciting of the five has to be listed first of
course. J
Something good is happening. J
I can’t tell you yet. Sorry. But it’s coming.
TWO
I’m obsessed with my daughter. I feel like I spend hardly
any time with her at all. On average, I get Monday through Friday nights from
5:45pm until 8:30pm when she’s sound asleep in bed, I get Monday through Friday
mornings from roughly 6:30am until 8:00am when I drop her off, and I get her
all day Saturday and Sunday. That may sound like enough time to you, but in
Mommy world, it’s close to nothing. It does make me cherish the weekends, but
she’s only this small once, right? So, if I unexpectedly miss out on my time
with her breaks my heart. I cry. Seriously, I cry. I cried last night talking
to Gene about mere possibilities, at the thought of missing out on our time.
THREE
You’ve heard people say that a child puts a damper on some
marriages. It’s true. I see my Mom friends and their husbands doing awesome
things together, or having more babies, or even just having deep conversations,
etc. Gene and I aren’t like that. We get one date night a month (where I’m
mostly talking about Emma, see number TWO above), and other than that we don’t
have any real adult time. After Emma goes to bed we do our separate things
before we head off to bed because that’s the time we have to do them (I’m sure
he doesn’t care to watch me pluck my eyebrows, lol). He goes to work 30 minutes
before I even get up. He works Saturdays, and we do family things on Sundays. There
is no time for us. And then when we magically do have time for us, we have
nothing to talk about. Isn’t that awful? Our silence gets broken by one of us
merely saying “I love Emma,” then we talk about her for another ten minutes or
so until we go off to do our own things or go to bed out of boredom.
We’ve acknowledged the fact that we are in a rut… that we
have nothing to talk about… that we don’t even really enjoy the same things to
do in our spare time. Has anything changed? No. It’s hard to change when you
have a good, consistent, functioning family life at home. Emma is in a routine.
She pretty much knows what is expected each night. It’s hard to rattle that
schedule to get in more adult time (I hate using the phrase “adult time”
because it sounds like I’m talking about dirty stuff, but I’m really just
talking about adult conversations and time to do things together). One date
night is hardly enough for us, yet I hate to even give up my Emma time for the one
night. It’s a lose-lose. How is a working Mom still supposed to have a life? I
feel bad even saying that, but I don’t see any of my non-mom friends, I don’t
have stress-relieving nights out. I don’t usually mind, but it takes its toll.
But am I willing to give up my Emma [time] for my sanity?
FOUR
It is awards show season. I love January! I love watching
red carpets, and the shows themselves. I love seeing the after party pictures,
and “who wore it better.” I always said that I was meant to be a celebrity (ha!).
However, so far this year all I have gotten in is part of the Golden Globes,
and that was just by luck because Emma hadn’t realized yet that “monkey’s gone.”
The SAG awards are coming up and I do love those; 45 second speeches are the
best. And I like that it’s actors voting for actors because then it’s not all
about the favorites. Also, the Oscars are coming the beginning of March I
think, so I really need to get to watching the movies nominated.
FIVE
I plan on us putting our house on the market in the Spring.
It is so close, yet I have absolutely no motivation to get going on the projects
that I have in mind. Ugh. Everything is truly so much harder with a child! As
much as I hate painting, I’d do it this weekend with my mom, if it wasn’t for
the fact that there is nobody to watch Emma. I have so much that I want to
order to help with organization and simplification, but with a toddler, how
organized can you really be? For each idea, comes a reason why it just won’t
work. I need to get out of that mindset and just do it already. Oy vay!
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