Dear Younger Jenni

Dear Younger Jenni,
I know that you have it rough. I know that you go through each day hating yourself and the direction your life is taking. Well I’m here to give you some advice that may make it easier. It’s your own fault if you don’t listen:
-          You shouldn’t be so concerned with what others think of you. Yes, your Mom tells you this all the time yet you roll your eyes. Guess what, she’s right. One day when you’re older you realize this and you are overall happier. So do yourself a favor and get over it now.
-          Quit obsessing over your weight. You don’t lose any. You probably never will. You will, however, learn to love your body in a different way, and some guys will even like it too. Chubby is normal, and eventually you’re actually going to be thinner than a few of the girls you envy now.
-          Don’t give your parents such a hard time about your curfew and your lack of partying. When you turn 21 you party enough for a lifetime, and one day you will be envious of all the sleep you got when you had to be home at 9pm. Go to bed early, and sleep late while you can.
-          Stay in college. Your teachers were correct when they claim almost all jobs one day will require a degree. If you don’t you will end up overworked and underpaid.
-          Quit telling everyone how much you dislike kids. I hate to say this, but one day you will have one of your own and you will be completely smitten. And yes, everything you say will come back to haunt you. So just keep your mouth shut.
-          When your Dad goes to buy you a new car, get the mustang. If you don’t, he will just tell everyone he tried to get it for you but you didn’t want it… so just get it and don’t feel guilty!
-          Learn something special… like how to play a ukulele, or join a Curling team. You’ll regret not having a special skill later in life if you don’t.
-          Come up with some money-making ideas in your teens and try them out. If you don’t, you will always wonder if you could have become a millionaire.
-          On that note, create a website that you can invite friends to join and become part of your daily life by posting what they are up to and even pictures. Call it Facebook.
-          You will meet a man in high school who one day will marry you and love you unconditionally. Here are some tips to avoid the drama:
o   Trust him. He will never, ever hurt you in any way that you think he will.
o   Don’t sweat the small stuff. Yes, he is selfish for the first 8 years (typical man), but it gets better after that. Go ahead and let him go out with his friends without you.
o   He’s a man. Don’t expect him to change. He will change if he wants to and in his own due time. Don’t try to force it either.
o   Enjoy him. Enjoy being married. Enjoy your time together. And quit questioning when it will all end.
-          Don’t let your husband take your car to go get tiramisu. He will make a side trip to a video game store and total your car in the process.
-          At an adult Easter Egg Hunt avoid drinking both wine and vodka. You WILL have your husband call your Mom to come pick you up even though he is very capable of driving you himself.
-          Never take the first salary a new job offers you. Just don’t, no matter how much you want the job.
-          Karma is real, so forgive your enemies and pitty those who bully you (there’s a reason why they are so angry, and it’s more than likely a rough home life).
Overall you will learn to love your life. You will make a lot of mistakes, and you will have a lot of regrets. A lot. But that’s normal. Try to be happy. You are beautiful, even though you don’t realize it until later just how beautiful you were, and you will continue to get even more beautiful as you get older (but it will be in a happy-mommy kind of way).
One day, a little too late in life (because you worry too much), you will realize how great you are, how great your family is, and you will be over-the-top happy. Just realize it sooner for your own sake.
Older Jenni